The following takes place between Antonin Scalia and his Tivo box

Last week Antonin Scalia said that torture is okay by the US constitution so long as it's for interrogation purposes as opposed to punishment. Others have been quick to point out that this is another case of Scalia watching too much 24. I'd like for interviewers to find out what other ideas Scalia has gleaned from TV. Perhaps we should issue ugly sunglasses to all government counter-terrorism agencies, they can take them off and put them on at appropriate moments - this gets results:

We could also buy them talking, self-aware automobiles:

Don't worry, the TV says it works!